Monday, August 13, 2007Y

im baq;
from night study todae;
did oral practices wif xin & sam todae;
it was quite alrite;
had a lil fun;

todae gort baq mother tongue o lvl result;
i din do well;
& i cried the most in sch todae;
it was silent tears;
many of them din noe how tuh console me;
i was lost;
i din noe wad tuh do;
but somehow deep in my heart;
there's a voice;
it told me nort tuh give up;
its nort as if its the end of the world;
i still have a second chance;
i can do it de;
my tears dried;

when i reached home;
my mum asked about my results;
den i told dem i did badly;
they reprimanded me;
my dad said he's disappointed;
my mum said my sis told her i sure will get an A;
but i din;
I DID NORT!
im STUPID;
i din work hard enuf tuh mit the expectation of them;
I DID NORT!
KY U SUCKS;
U REALLY SUCKS;
i tot when i reached home;
let dem know the results;
dey wud comfort & console me;
tell me tt;
ky, try harder next tyme alrite? there's still another chance;
but they did nort;
they reprimanded me';
was this kinda results expected out of myself?
DEFINITELY NO!
but why did they kip scolding;
am i nort vexed enuf?
it took me a long tyme tuh settle down;
& now, it starts all over again;
its always my fault;
IT IS ALWAYS MY FAULT!
people can get A why cant i?
WHY CANT I?!
dey blame on things;
wadeva possessions tt i have;
blame it on my fone;
blame it on my new com;
WADEVA they cud blame on;
dun wanna spend money on the retest;
im gonna save it myself & pay tt fee my self;
im nort gonna reply on them anymore;
im gonna retake the test & make sure i score an A;
WTF;

Lord, i shall really jus sit down & reflect;
izzit the results a sort of reminder tt i shud manage both Christianity & studies evenly?
when i cant even study well?
i tot i made myself really clear tt i will settle Christianity after my Os?
or m i thinking too much?
Lord, im nort blaming u;
instead im blaming myself;
for nort knowing wad tuh do;
i have one more subject;
one more burden for coming Os;
onli u can help me now;
Lord, can u pls. really pls tell me wad tuh do?
shud i jus sit at home and study?
i shud nort study in a grp isn't it?
cant concentrate isn't it?
i really cannort afford tuh bet my O wif something else;
i have tuh excel;
Lord, can u pls help me this tyme ard?
i promise tuh exchange anything for it;
let me know wad shall i do;
i really can onli depend on you now;
i know you will. will you?
tell me the ans. by my heart;
thanks;

thanks God for keeping me alive;
when things dun go in my way;
i know u have another plan for it;
but i wish tt nothing cud stop me from excelling now;
i onli trust you;
pls lead me. show me the way;
thanks really lots;
U RAWKS!
i stone;

sign off;
yimyim

YWELCOME